Thursday, June 14

I may be...

I may be the most insane and psychotic person right now. Considering the events in the last few days, I still consider myself a psychotic over-the-board type of person. There are times that I dread to open my mail,just because I feel there's the word REJECTION there. I am so stupid because I never seemed to mind what I'll feel if I do get that dreaded e-mail from him. But nonetheless,WHAT'S DONE IS DONE. There's nothing that can change that. All I can hope is that he treats that as a kind of joke or he doesn't receive it. Whichever way, I hope I don't get HURT. I hate getting hurt.

This may seem ever so weird to people but he makes me HAPPY and I'm so at ease to talk to him or better term is,CHAT. I totally lose it when he puts up his display picture and I get lost in his eyes. Those small,chinky,brown eyes. The hair that makes him look like a Korean matinee idol. The smile that makes my insides melt. Every little part of him, every word he types, every SMS he texts, makes me like him a little more. HE is older than me by four years yet it seems like AGE is nothing but a number to me. Distance no longer anything but a couple of numerals combined to make a whole number. He's so hard to reach yet I find myself reaching out to him no matter how far, how wide or how long the journey might take.


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