Tuesday, August 26
I am trying to take in everything at the moment, maybe not so moderately. I am embracing everything around me, as if these things make sense. I feel free today, like I am floating and dancing on thick marshmallow clouds. I do not miss you at all. Nor do I miss the memories of us. I feel like everything has faded like an old photograph and even if technology would permit me to restore these memories of you, I wouldn't.
Today, I am inspired to write not about what I felt in the past few months, but what it feels like without you. It, honestly, was a bumpy ride at first, full of unknowns, of fear, of pain and of so many tears. Me without you is a breath of fresh air, something that I am thankful for everyday. When I wake up every morning, I make sure to thank God that I experienced so much pain this year, because I wouldn't be able to appreciate what I have always had and what I have now. Every splash on my face, every jog I take every week, every 100 pages or so that I have to read for my law class, I owe it to you. Thank you for not believing we could make this work, because I finally know what I have to accomplish on my own. Thank you for letting me see what I missed out on.
I feel as free as a bird, whose wings have just begun to function. The wind is cold on my face and it's comforting. At first, I thought everything would be so awkward, that a tiny step might be too much or that in an instant, I could fall and break. But at the end of the day, thank you for making me see the world without you. To the places I have yet to see, the people I have yet to meet and to the countless lessons that I still have to learn, I am ready for everything! Bring it on, universe. Let me take a whack at it.