Sunday, April 24

just one night

She has been glued to her computer all day. She wonders when this--whatever this is---everything is going to stop. The madness is absolutely killing her. She couldn't just lie on her bed and do nothing, which would probably be the best thing to do in her state. No, she'd just dig up old memories as if that weren't happening to her now. The pictures, the dinners and of course, the phone calls. She thought she had thrown these away...for she hadn't thought of these things in a month, believing she made enough progress. It's fascinating that one could forget just for a while the importance of somebody. It took her long enough.

Not now. She wasn't about to give up now. What would have the progress all been for if she was going to fall into a deep hole yet again? This feeling wasn't foreign to her. She welcomed it like an old friend, without even meaning to. In her head, she should have banished the feelings away like what she would have done a week ago. No, tonight, she gives a big old hug and lays cozy in its arms. She missed this feeling. In fact, it was so long ago and yet it was all so familiar. However, she was convinced that this "familiarity" wasn't beneficial to her and she would have to break it soon enough.

But, just for this one night, let me hold on to this, just this one night.