A letter

Dear you,

In certain ways I have learned to tell myself that I am not the most emotional person ever. I have learned to conceal in the best way possible that everything I'm feeling is something normal, that you need not to worry and that I know you love me.

And most of the time, I do feel it. I just don't think I can ever compete with her.

I also know that I am trying to hurt myself by exposing myself to things that I shouldn't. I can't help it.

Also know that, even if I'm not the most romantic or sweetest person in the world (like her), I try. I try as hard as I could to make you feel that I'm invested in you. I love every part of you and you should know that I want to be enough because I can never be as sweet or as good as her. I will always be like this.

I'm not even going to think about every experience you've had with her, but I know that there will always be a special connection and I'm afraid at any time, it will spark again and everything we have will be gone with the wind. Truth be told, I am shaking. I want you to love me and every part of me and just listen to me.

Help me understand that I will be the only one, the only one who holds your heart because until then, I never know if I can ever be enough.

Janine