Here we go again. You're confused. You feel like it's the right thing to do. Waiting is not the answer. Move on, get a life and have fun with friends. Stop thinking you're not of value. You are. A lot of people love you and appreciate you and you shouldn't limit yourself to depending on what he thinks. He's not the only person in your life. Stop feeling inferior or ugly. People say otherwise. You should find someone who is worthy of your love and appreciates who you are. You will end up hurting yourself even more if you keep this up.
Also, stop being jealous of her. You're not in a position to be and you know that quite well. Stop thinking about it all the time. It just gives you headaches and awful chest pains that you don't know why the hell it's happening. Relax and love life, please. You really need to.
Your concerned self
P.S. Continue eating and stop the constant dieting. You're not fat, okay?