A Letter For You (among so many letters I continue to write in my head)

I want to give up.

I want to stop being wrapped up in a world where I know what I want happens. What are the odds of me getting what I would love to have?

You sit in a corner and I notice you. I could never ignore your stance, the way you dressed today, your shoes, your smile and that adorable thing you just can't seem to shake off. I'm not as observant as you, I realize that. However, you continue to amaze me with everything that may not be as cute as to other people.

I want to tell you that it's cute when you laugh hard, it's amazing when you call my name, it's relaxing and stressing at the same time when you put your arms around me and for once, I feel important to you.

I'd love to hear you breathe. In and out, in and out. If I could just stay to hold your hand for a minute and tell you what my entire being thinks of you. Just to let you know, you are DIFFERENT. You are SPECIAL. You are INSANE. You are FUNNY. You are CORNY. You are SMART. You are EVERYTHING that I did not EXPECT. And still, YOU ARE NOT MINE.

Someday, I will take the risk. Jump to you even if that could mean jumping and staying on the moon with you, I'd do it. I'd climb mountains for you, I'd eat pork for you, I'd do everything you want me to.

Pathetic. I'm pathetic.

In love. I'm in love.

I'm pathetic and in love. :(